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My Story...

So this is where I tell you my own personal forays into the SEXY* (and not so sexy) sojourns of self-loving.  My stories are multiple and they're still unfolding but the following are the most pivotal moments that led me deeper into a space of unapologetic self-confidence rooted in radical self-acceptance.

  1. When I was young, I was a really shy Black girl struggling with low self esteem.  But creating something, anything, made me feel less invisible.  I used different artforms like poetry, singing, dance and crafting to express myself. And in doing so, I felt more empowered and beautiful.  And less alone.  In 2018, I launched Empressive Expressions to inspire other Black girls and womxn to use art in ways that also make them feel seen, celebrated and beautiful.  I want the stories that I create and share to help them heal and love themselves better.  

  2. The same year I began my business, however, I contemplated killing myself. It was the beginning of the year and I had just returned from my first sexy solo vacation but I wasn’t happy.  I wrote this poem called "Confession" and after I wrote it, I was so scared I might harm myself, that I called my family. But writing that poem saved my life.  It was literally my cry for help. It’s why I believe so strongly in the creative power of self-expression. Sometimes our Art is the only outlet we have to release the pain we carry inside of us. And much of our art flows from our relationship to pleasure.  My relationship back then was disjointed and unbalanced.  I felt confident enough to venture off to Turks & Caicos for a solo adventure.  But I was partly escaping from the internal insecurities and emptiness I was attempting to avoid experiencing. 

  3. But I would say, my self love journey officially began in 2011, during a dissatisfied romantic relationship. I realized that I didn’t like the person who I was when I was with my partner. I was very angry. I didn’t create. I felt very unfulfilled and disappointed in both them and myself. So, I re-started my journaling practice, thereby discovering deep-ceded self-esteem issues in need of resolution. I was also growing my first set of locs which was teaching me how to redefine what I found beautiful about myself.  These moments of reconnection with myself started teaching me how to better self-advocate (or show up for myself).  

  4. The personal reclamation I began within my former romantic relationship gained momentum once I finally released myself from that attachment.  I started writing again.  I sought stages and creative communities to publicly express myself which led to tremendous recognition, rewards and unexpected opportunities.  I started to take my art, talents and self seriously, stretching beyond previous limitations, aspirations and fears.  I became known not just as a poet but a powerful spoken word artist.  Then I began using my platform to share erotica and the they say, is history. 

  5. When I didn't die from sharing some of my most intimate dreams and desires on stage, I started more boldly living them!  I did my first semi-nude boudoir shoot for my 26th b'earthday and loved the experience so much I did it annually for the next 4 years.  I took more solo trips (domestically and internationally). I played Caribbean Carnival Mas by myself.  I cut off the first set of locs I'd been growing for 7 years and rocked a purple, turquoise, mohawk.  I came out as Queer!

I have been falling deeper and deeper in love with myself since I started the entire process of figuring out who TF I am, why I exist, and why do I do what tf I do?!  It hasn't been the easiest process 24/7, but the more I safely center play, pleasure and creative self-expression, the more free, expansive, full, whole, peaceful and powerful AF do I feel in my life!


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